版权声明：转载时请以超链接形式标明文章原始出处和作者信息及本声明
http://counselorsusan.blogbus.com/logs/13198131.html

Class note from Dr.French Jones (DTS)

Anger--a counseling perspective

I. Agressive Anger--2 kinds

1. Passive: laziness, messiness, chronic lateness, forgetfulness, unwillful compliance, deliberate slowness, complaining/being critical. (people who dwells in it may not be aware of it)
2. Active: hitting, throwing, breaking,reckless driving, yelling & verbal abuse, physical abuse.

II. works of the Flesh

Galatians 5:19-21-- unhealthy anger can be seen as linked to these kinds of behaviors.

III. Assertive Anger

healthy anger is anger that is directed toward sinful actions.

• the action taken against sin is appropriate such as Jesus and the moneychangers in the temple ( Jn 2:12-16)
• To not be angry at sinful actions is to not have access to being healthy emotionally. Even God is angry at sinful actions and our goal in life is to become more like HIM.

IV. Anger & the Grief process

• shock or denial: 'I can't believe this!'
• anger turned outward: what caused the loss? God? a disease? Circumstances?
• anger turned inward: 'Why didn't I do..?'
• Resolutions: tears; feeling the loss
• Acceptance: can be sad, but no tears.

V. Def of effective grieving

effective grieving is:

• getting in touch with the loss by talking or writing about it..
• expressing our emotions appropriately by talking, writing, crying..
• over a period of time (weeks/months)
• p.s: the more significant the loss, the more painful the grief process will be.

VI. Anger and Forgiveness

when the cause of the anger is HURT:

we must seek to forgive the person who caused the pain.If we do not forgive, we 'stuff' the anger and it comes out in unhealthy ways.

Note: Just because we forgive does not mean that we also can reconciled to the person--a true apology is needed. p.s: a personal testimony from susan: in our case, my parents and I chose to forgive the person as the forgiveness redeemed ourselves as well. Yet it doesn't mean there was reconciliation between us and the person,since he never truely apologized (he may not even realize what was wrong with him). We chose to love him and pray for him as he is a brother, even though we do not like him.

VII. our goal as christians

• our ultimate goal as Christians to be conformed to the image of Christ ( Rom 8:29)
• Rom 12:18, Eph 4:32, 1The 4:13
• show the fruit of the spirit ( Gal 5:22-23) by walking in the power of the Holy Spirit.